I love bringing roses to a woman when she least expects it. ~ Esai Morales
It’s exactly what you had hoped it would be. Thrilled, overjoyed, undeniable. Chocolate. Check. Bottle of wine. Check. Card. Check. A romantic weekend in the wild. Check. Gift. Check. Dinner. Double check. A good day to proclaim love, a good time to pledge eternal allegiance to your heartthrob. Arrow O’ Luv has struck someone’s heart.
Well, not so quite. There have rarely been more overrated days than this Feast of Saint Valentine. Jay Leno put it clearly. ‘Today is Valentine’s Day – or, as the men like to call it, Extortion Day!’ He’s probably right. Valentine’s Day kind of love, to a man, is more of upholding your end of the bargain and fulfilling your duties, lest the nagging occurs of what embarrassment she experienced in front of her peers.
It’s become a holiday of obligation. A man is expected to display a bravura, ego-has-landed performance that only serves the interests of the beneficiary or the businessman who sells the heart shaped gift box. Oh forget only last week he was philandering and she was busy with the boss as he waited in the car park. Love has got to be shown today, right?
That expression of love has to be accompanied with a gift, and not just any gift. It’s never been out of one’s volition. Seriously, it’s never been. Men have to spend, or the lady’s piercing look will send shivers down one’s spine. Poor thing. In the recent weeks, retailers have bombarded you with messages of how you need to shower your woman with gifts to show her how truly special she is. Like they really care.
Look at the malls, check the adverts. This is not a love holiday, it’s a commercialized one. The bouquet of flowers will need to be delivered, the sweetened processed food produced from the seed of the theobroma cacao seed will have to find its way into the hamper. Woe unto you if she doesn’t like her gift. Your year will feel like it has more than 365 days.
As excitement hits the stratosphere, with shades of red and black hogging our streets and the crave, nay, the craze blinding us, it’s important to note that love doesn’t need a day to be professed, it doesn’t need a defined moment to be captured. In the words of Morales, shower her with gifts when she least expects it. That should boost the magnitude of your love and bond with a few kilotons.
You don’t need a day to be responsible for your happiness. If love cannot be expressed any and every time throughout the year, then celebrating it today is akin to blind faith. Love should be when the desire to be desired takes you so badly you feel you can’t live without your sweetheart. It’s not limited to a day, it doesn’t stop after Feb 14th.
This day of love has morphed into something totally different from what Valentine initiated. If this day is to be celebrated, then Valentine’s Day should be every day. And not just with gifts.
Each time you love, love deeply as if it were forever. ~ Audre Lorde