Husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church.
All eyes are on you and, like a star, you revel in it. A camera follows you in the house, following your every step, and you remain coolly undetached, a man on a mission. You are the head of the house, the alpha male, the king of your small kingdom, and every living being in that household should receive that particular memo. After all your word is law.
You sit down and service comes to you lightning fast from the missus of the house, your wife. The stew’s cold, take it back, you belch. Oh, forget it’s the wee hours of the night. It doesn’t matter to you, does it? After all you paid the dowry, she needs to submit to you, doesn’t she?
There may be three verses that talk about wives submitting to their husbands, but there are seven that talk about God’s command for husbands to love their wives. Even He knew it; it’s easier for a wife to submit than it is for a husband to love. And since God commands obedience, He expects that husbands loving their wives will be followed to the letter.
Listen. It has to be sincere, the love you claim to show to your wife. Whatever else may be said of your role as the head of the house, there’s no saving grace if you do not treat her good, if you don’t reflect what God’s love is. Your love needs to be unselfish, as you dedicate yourself to doing what is best for your missus.
Love her in a way that brings out the best in her, that evokes her beauty, that makes her whole. Lead her in the right direction as you make her blossom in her life. Trust your wife to have your best interests in her heart. Don’t be proud, there’s nothing wrong in letting her have an opinion or thought that doesn’t agree with yours.
She’s not your servant, she’s your wife. So please stop giving orders while bumming in your couch, as she works in the house with your child strapped on her back. She’s not your servant, so learn to let her make some decisions, learn to use her input as well. Actually, learn to involve her before making any decisions. Intelligence was one of the attraction factors, right?
Your love for your wife should be marked by giving, not getting. You need to demonstrate servant leadership. Helping around in the house doesn’t reduce your headship. Serving her, warming her bath, cooking a descent meal doesn’t make you a lesser man. No. It takes a secure man to be sacrificial, it takes a loving husband to know his place.
So, you’ve had a fight, an emotional draining argument. Who’s responsibility is it to initiate reconciliation? That’s right, the husband’s. Whenever there’s drama in the house, it’s your duty to apologize and make peace. Didn’t Christ seek reconciliation by dying for our sake, even though it was man who had rebelled?
Forget what your peers will say about you. After all, once the night settles in, they’ll be gone back to their homes, they’ll treat their wives as they so desire. You’ll be left with that one person who will stick with you till death do you part, that one person who will be by your side through thick and thin, long after your friends have deserted you.
Love your wife as you love yourself, whether she submits to you or not. Be faithful to her, trust her and be patient with her. She’s your full partner, not a possession to serve your every desire.
Love her unconditionally, and treat her like the best gift God has ever given to you.
Husbands, each of you must dedicate yourself to your wife and to her goods, you must purpose and do those things that are best for her, whether you like her or not, no matter how she treats you, even if it kills you, just as Christ dedicated and gave his life to the church.